Rita: Hello, this is Rita Trevalyan with another character Lt. Herm`es Gorsuch. He started out as a Master Sergeant, but received a battlefield commission between the 2nd and 3rd book of my accidental trilogy. Hello, Lieutenant.
Gorsuch: Hello, Ma’am.
Rita:Which planet are you from, originally?
Gorsuch: Zyeho IV. It’s a lovely world. You really should visit it sometime.
Rita: I shall, when I get the chance. I don’t often get out of this Solar System, you know. But back to you: Are you married?
Gorsuch: Yes, Seven years now and have 3 kids, 2 boys and a girl. Really sweet, well behaved kids. Smart, too.
Rita: Who is your wife? What does she do?
Gorsuch: Strangely enough, she has the same first name as you, Rita. She works from home. She’s a digital librarian for our town library. She has a very capable chemdroid watching the kids. My eldest is in school. We expect he’ll either go to the Stellarman Academy or the Feldmar Institute next year.
Rita: Where do you see yourself in five Galactic Standard years, Lieutenant?
Gorsuch: Well, if I survive the next war, and we’re fixin’ to have one, Ms. Trevalyan, don’t kid yourself, with their allies the Oraspighi at their sides, having taught then how to do away with the need for females completely, the Koinonians are going to attack the Inner Worlds, and when that happens, all Hral will break loose. You watch.
Rita: Whooee! Another war! I’ll bet the Empress won’t be real happy about that..She hates war. You say they have no females? How did they do that?
Gorsuch: Well, as my daddy used to say, “Beats me, Lieutenant, I’m not the regular crew chief.” I come from a military family, you know. But Daddy never liked base housing. He reasoned, that with transmats everywhere, a soldier can be on duty in a matter of nanoseconds, no matter where he is in the Compire. And I can train for the battlefield better if I live close to a wilderness, so that’s where I’m bringing up my children. I’ve been on leave there for the past couple of lunations.
Rita: do you have any pastimes or hobbies not related to fighting?
Gorsuch: In my copious spare time, haha, I put together models of battle starships. Other than that, I’m training, always training. Gotta stay battle ready, you know. It wouldn’t do at all to let myself become soft.
Rita: Do you have any pets?
Gorsuch: I don’t know if you’d really call them pets, per se, dogs. But I raise fighting dogs. They can sniff out explosives and warn us human soldiers. They also warn against other kinds of booby traps. They’re not ordinary regular dogs. They’re mutants, genetically designed like we are. And my wife, she has a cat that can talk. The chemdroids clean the cat box, but mostly the cat uses the toilet like we do.
Rita: Are your parents alive?
Gorsuch: No. My dad got killed in the war against the Koinonians and the aliens, those bugs, they’re so disgusting, you know? Mom’s still alive, though. She takes a rejuve bath every 5 years, you know, to stay young. She has a not a boyfriend, that’s so jejeune, Significant Oth, I think you’d call him. Nice guy, and he really thinks a lot of Mom, treats her right, you know, like a lady should be.
Rita: And we’ll close with what is your earliest memory?
Gorsuch: I think I was about three Galactic Standard Years old. My dad took me out in the woods to experience nature. He was going hunting, but I just sat on a fallen log and observed all the creatures. They were all curious about me. They knew to avoid my dad, because he had a gun, no, not a gun, this is your weapon, this is you gun, your weapon is for killing, your gun is for fun. They came up and sniffed me.
Rita: Thank you, Lieutenant. That was very enlightening.