PNS Interview with Rhedi Krishnamurthi, PhD

 

Teresa Reitan <tezra.reitan@gmail.com>	Mon, Oct 19, 12:25 PM (3 days ago)
to Elise, me

PNS:  Good evening!  Rita Trevalyan here with Rhedi Krishnamurthi, PhD.  There was once a famous yogi with that surname.  Are you any relation?

Rhedi:  He was my ancestor, but I’m proud to say that our family has turned to science and away from that New Age crap.  It’s only for suckers.

PNS:  Glad to hear it.  What is your specialty?

Rhedi:Geology.  Proserpina is a very geologically alive planet.  I shall measure the seismic movements and determine when another volcano is likely to erupt.  Our party will then travel the planet to the lava tubes and help the people move out of their underground homes to a place hopefully well away from the volcanic activity.  

PNS:  So they will be moving back to the cities on the surface.

Rhedi:  That is correct, mem.  But how they live afterwards is not my concern.  The anthropologists will take care of them.  

PNS:  It is interesting that there doesn’t seem to have been much geological activity during the time the planet was wandering the cosmos, searching for a home.  

Rhedi:  There was no geological activity during that time.  But when it encountered the gravity of our sun, things started moving again.

PNS:  So our sun does more than just illuminate and heat the planets, it makes geological activity possible?

Rhedi:  That is correct, mem.  Why our moon is geologically dead is an open question.  I daresay a team of scientists will be sent to the moon to find out why this is so.   

PNS:  Maybe yours truly will be able to cover that exciting science story.

Rhedi:  Perhaps.  

PNS:  You heard it here first, folks!  Tune in next week for another exciting interview with the members of the Proserpina Exploration team, same bat time, same bea channel.

PNS Interview with the Hon. Oliver Pennstroke III PhD

 PNS:  Rita Trevalyan here with Oliver Pennstroke III, PhD from the United Kingdom.  How are you tonight Dr. Pennstroke?

Pennstroke: Fine, but call me Oliver. Dr. Pennstroke is my father, a famous surgeon, doncha know?

PNS:  Oh, yes, internationally famous.  He made history by transplanting an ear that was grown on a rat’s back to a human who had lost his ear in an auto accident.  Where did you get your degree, and what is your area of specialization?

Pennstroke:  Cambridge, and exoanthropology.

PNS:  So the UN Space Agency knew aheady that there was likely to be or there had been intelligent life on Proserpina, and they were likely to be humanoid?

Pennstroke:  Oh, yes.  The probes sent by NASA discovered this straightaway, and they generously shared the news with the entire world.  But we didn’t discover the exact nature of the humanoids until well after we had landed.  Several of the women reported having disturbing and very vivid dreams about them, and Fran reported having seen something move in her peripheral vision while out examining how the constellations look while several million kilometers away from Earth.

PNS: Pennstroke, that’s a rather unusual surname.  Do you know anything about its origin?

Pennstroke:  Oh, yes.  I had an ancestor who was a scribe in the court of Henry VIII around the time of our Reformation.  He had been a churchman, but after the Reformation he was encouraged  to leave the  Church and take a wife.  So he did.  She was one of the Hampton maidservants.  That’s how my family got started.  

PNS.   Fascinating  What lies ahead for your mission?.  

Pennstroke:  We will be doing some more exploration of the planet to see if there are other tribes hidden underground in other places.  We know there are at least two tribes.  We suspect there must be more.  

PNS:  You heard it here first, folks.  Stay tuned next week when we will have another exciting interview with another member of the intrepid Proserpina Exploration team.

PNS Interview with Frances MacFadden, PhD

 PNS:  Good evening!  Rita Trevalyan here from the Planetary News Service here with Frances MacFadden, PhD from Canada.  You’re from Nova Scotia, aren’t you, Dr. MacFadden?

MacFadden: Aye, That I am.  A suburb just outside of Halifax.  

PNS:  And what is your field of expertise?

MacFadden:  I be an anthropologist, and please call me Frances, or Fran.  Dr. MacFadden be me uncle, an oncologist.

PNS:  All right, Fran.  So the UN Space Agency already suspected there might be advanced life on Proserpina. 

MacFadden:  That they did, aye.  The probe they sent picked up a city or two. I studied the tribe who had been living in the lava tubes near the city, and then we traveled east of the city to see if there be any other tribes sequestered underground in more lava tubes. We were not disappointed.

PNS:  Indeed you were not.  Dr. Vogel told us you already had a mechanical translator working, so communicating with the people there was no problem.

MacFadden:  Oh, he did, did he?  Dr. Vogel is famous for having a big mouth.  Now everyone will want to come, and I wanted to keep the natives in as pristine condition as they were when we found them.  We earthlings have a bad reputation for what we do when we meet indigenous peoples. My, Davida’s and Winnie’s mission is to mitigate some of that.

PNS:  A very worthy mission all around.  Everyone I’ve talked to, with the exception of RedEagle, who is an MD, is a PhD.  Can you tell us more about the selection process?

MacFadden:  Oh, aye.  There was a competition to select the experts in our fields, and the 20 of us were the winner.  Well, there were 25, but 5 washed oot during the weight training exercises.  It was felt they would not do well in the increased gravity.  

PNS:  And did the weight training prepare you adequately for the increased gravity?

MacFadden:  Oh, aye!  I developed muscles I didn’t even ken I had.  This may cut down on the numbers of people who want to come here.  The amount of training for a trip here is very stringent, and not for everyone.

PNS:  There you have it.  One of our doughty astronauts warning everyone off going there.  Stay tuned for another stimulating interview with a member of the Proserpina Exploration Team next week.  Sam bat time, Same bat channel

PNS Interview with Hans Vogel, PhD

 PNS:  Good evening!  This is Rita Trevalyan of the Planetary News Service here with Hans Peter Vogel PhD, a leading exoagronomist and exobotanist, and a member of the Proserpina Exploration Team.  So you are also in Nadyezhka Politovena’s field. Do you ever disagree about things?

Hans Vogel: Nein, nein!  Ve get along perfectly!  Because you see, our fields of expertise do not really overlap zat much.

PNS:  Excellent!  Did you know each other before the team was selected?

Hans Vogel:  Jawohl!  Fery vell!  In fact, I recommended her for vun of za spots on za team.  

PNS:  Interesting!  She didn’t mention this when I interviewed her a few weeks ago.  

Hans Vogel (puts his hand to his mouth):  Oh!  Did I tell a tale out of school?

PNS:  It’s all right.  I can always interview her again.  You and several other members of the team made a trip elsewhere in the temperate zone recently.  How did that go?

Hans Vogel:  Fery vell!  Ve met members of another tribe who had been living in za lava tubes for a very long time.  At first they vere very shy, but zey slowly varmed to us, especially vhen ve told zem about the success Nadyezhka und Onoye vere haffing vith der farming.  Uh oh, I did it again, didn’t I?

PNS:  Yes, I heard that tribe later tried to raid the main tribe’s food stores.

Hans Vogel:  I caused zat, didn’t I?  I haf got to keep my big mouth shut.  

PNS:  It turned out all right, though.  Winifred’s tribe shared with yours.  Apparently all they had to do was ask.  

Hans Vogel:  But I feel bad about zose who got hurt during za raid.  Zat vas my fault.

PNS:  No, it wasn’t.  It was your tribe’s decision to go in there like gang busters and not ask politely for what they needed.  I hope they have learned to behave themselves.  Winifred’s tribe sounds very generous.  

Hans Vogel:Oh, zey are.  Onoye explained it to me.  They use a concept his tribe in Africa have called Unbuntu, vich means community.  Ve haf a zimilar zing in Germany.  It is very peculiar that two places zo far apart as Africa and here should haf it, und yet za two tribes on za same planet do not have it.  Za tribe ve discovered vere ready to rob za tribe here.  (shakes head sadly)

PNS:Yes, very peculiar indeed.  Thank you Dr. Vogel.  Stay tuned for our next exciting interview next week.  Same bat time, same bat channel.  

PNS Interview with Obagado Onoye, PhD

 PNS:  Good evening.  This is Rita Trevalyan with Planetary News Service here to interview Obogado Onoye of the Proserpina Exploratory Mission.  How are you tonight, Mr. Obagado?

Onoye:  Mr. Obagado is my father.  Please call me Onoye.

PNS:All right, Onoye.  What is your job in the mission?

Onoye:  My specialty is hydraulics.  Anything having to do with water, I’m your man.  

PNS: So on the trip over, you assisted Nadyezhka with her plants, and now you are assisting the natives to irrigate their crops.

Onoye: Yes.  It is very exciting.  When my father was a very young boy, the American Peace Corps came to his village and taught the people how to  have fresh water for drinking and cooking, and water for their crops and bathing.  Now I do the same thing for these people.  Davida started by digging up an ancient irrigation channel, and I found the rest of the channels.It is like the Peace Corps all over again.

PNS: That does sound very exciting.  How hard is it to learn the language?

Onoye:  Oh, Winifred has taken care of all of that.  She learned it first, and had 2 natives to help her with accent and modernize her pronunciation, and the three of them have been giving us language lessons.  She is a true polyglot.  I don’t know of a language that she hasn’t at least tried to learn.  

PNS:  How many languages do you speak, Onoye?

Onoye:  Only 4.  English, of course, Afrikaans, That’s a dialect of Dutch, I’m learning the language here, I’ve picked up a little Russian, mostly swear words, I’m afraid, and X!hosa, my tribal language.  Father would never forgive me if I forgot that.  

PNS: What is your present ambition?  What would you like to do on Proserpina that you haven’t done yet?

Onoye:  Continue learning the language, of course.  Being able to communicate with these people is such a basic part of life that I don’t know how we could proceed without it.  And once I have become a bit more grounded in the language, I’d like to learn more about the people and the culture they set up when they had to live in the lava tubes.  I am also an anthropologist, you know.  

PNS::Thank you, Onoye.  Tune in next week for another stimulating  interview with a member of this team.

PNS Interview with Davida Izriri, PhD

 PNS:  This is Rita Trevalyan here with Davida Iszrri.  You’re from Israel, right, Dr. Iszriri?

Davida:  Right, but call me Davida.  Dr. Iszriri is my mother the medical doctor.  I’m just a simple archaeologist.

PNS:  Not so simple.  You’ve made a few discoveries, haven’t you?

Davida:  Yes, all of us have.  What used to be a city very close to our encampment.  And it’s in remarkably well preserved condition.  

PNS:  Does the city have a name?

Davida:  We are calling it Cerberus after the three headed dog who used to guard the entrance to Hades, to make sure that only the dead entered there.

PNS:  Cerberus, interesting name.

Davida:but Winifred, our ancient language expert, is working even now on translation to discover their name for the city.

PNS:  Where did you get your PhD?

Davida:  Tel Aviv University, then I did some postdoctoral study in Jerusalem.   I was studying the Western wall of the Temple, the Wailing Wall, when I was called to this mission.Did you know that under the right wind conditions the Wailing Wall actually does wail?

PNS:  No, I didn’t.  I thought it got its name because of the people who stand there and wail over the destruction of the Temple.  

Davida::  Well, that too.  

PNS:  How did Dr. Harris manage to learn their language so she could translate it?

Davida:  Well you’re going to have to have another interview with her, aren’t you?  But to make a long story short, she discovered that it resembles ancient Mayan, except that the characters are phonetic, like ancient Egyptian rather than ideographic.

PNS:  Thank you, Davida for a very interesting talk.  Tune in next week for another inspiring interview of another member of the Proserpina Exploration Team.

PNS Interview with Marcel Goddard, PhD

 PNS:  This is Rita Trevalyan with the Planetary News Service interviewing Marcel Pierre Goddard PhD, one of the brave astronauts on the Proserpina Exploration Team.  How are you, Dr. Goddard?

MPG:  Si vous plait, call me Marcel.  I am fine.  How are you?

PNS:  Can’t complain.  What is your area of expertise?

MPG:  I am a physical anthropologist.  If we find humanoid remains on the planet, it is my job to analyze them, and get a picture of what they were life in life.  

PNS:  What are the chances you will find signs of advanced life on the planet?

MPG: Oh, I would say about 50-50.

PNS:  What do you mean by that?

MPG:  Either we will or we will not.  It could go either way.

PNS:  Where did you study?

MPG:  At the Sorbonne, of course, is there really any other universite?

PNS:  I can see you’re still very loyal  to your alma mater.  What are your plans fo after this mission?

MPG:  Well, UNSA has plans for me, make the circuit, you know, and I probably will write a book about my experiences, and settle down to be a husband and father.  I’m engaged, you see.  Engaged to be married.  It was all quite sudden, you know, but we are very happy about it.

PNS:  Congratulations, Marcel!  Tune in next week for another stimulating interview with one of the members of the Proserpina mission.